Writers at all levels struggle daily with how to say things better. Some days our words seem like feral cats defying every effort to round them up and make them do what we want. Oh, wait, maybe I should have said bend to our will instead of do what we want. No, maybe that reads too lofty. And suppose there was a need for brevity; I could have said do our will or yield. That would have cut a word or two from the sentence. You see what I mean. And if I dither too long, I'll never finish the darned story. So, what's a writer to do? Here are a few practices you might employ.

Free writing – This idea has become very popular in the last several years, perhaps because writers realize that caution often hampers creativity. In other words, if you're too concerned about saying everything perfectly, you'll turn out something stilted and – well – uncreative. So first off, let yourself go and get crazy. With no holds barred write as your soul directs.

Leave then return – Okay, your first draft is on the page, and you've put it away. Whatever length of time you choose to leave it, when you return you must go in with vigor. Every worthy story needs a beautiful bed to lie in, and making that bed is your next job. Here we go.

1. Wipe out qualifiers. Rather, very, pretty and little are some common offenders. I confess, in spite of the many years I've been writing, I still use the word little a lot. It's unconscious, but I clobber most of them in the re-write.

2. Nouns and verbs are what give your story strength. They're like your main meal. Adjectives and adverbs are dessert. Go easy on it. Have a nice apple instead of that big slab of chocolate cake drizzled with caramel sauce.

3. Check for overuse of gerunds, words ending in ing, and the onomatopoeia, words that sound like what they're describing. Children's and young adult writers are especially vulnerable to the charms of the onomatopoeia. It’s so tempting to put the Pow! into the prose. But, the daring young man on the flying trapeze went Splat! when the rope broke, is about all you have to say to make your point.

4. Monitor explanatory verbs. Your attributives won't need them for the most part. "Don't shoot me, Farmer Brown!" is superior to "Don't shoot me, Farmer Brown," Bunny said pleadingly. The exclamation point in the first sentence says it all. We'll assume on our own that Bunny is pleading for his life.

5. Above all be clear. There's nothing as delightful as a story that moves along with no confusing bumps or hurdles. Read yours out loud. If your tongue tangles over a phrase or sentence your reader's will, too. No one wants to break the flow of your intriguing story to interpret some awkward bit as though it were a poorly cut puzzle piece. And you don't want the person who plunked down good money for your story giving up in disgust. Check and re-check for clarity.

I was recently chastised by an editor who has taken many articles from me. It was right after the holidays, and I was in a hurry to get back to writing. My first paragraph was a mish mash of odd thoughts and misplaced commas. I'd chopped up a couple of sentences in a careless re-write and made a few publication references she didn't like. Ugh. I was so annoyed with myself. But I apologized, went in for the kill, and a week later sent a better article she approved of and bought. In light of that, here is a short exercise that might help you.

How would you make the following sentences better?

* There weren't as many co-workers at Brandon's party as his wife had hoped for.
* The rabbit being chased by the fox ran very quickly into the hole in the old log.
* "I'll be back," said Charlie, grinning.

My suggestions:

* Fewer co-workers came to Brandon's party than Megan hoped.
* The rabbit ran into the old log to escape the fox.
* This sentence is just fine. The gerund is used well.

Like me and my post-holiday article you've undoubtedly had writing days where you simply could not get it right. Step back and slow down. On another day you'll go in with magic fingers, straighten the bed linens and find a way to say it better.

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Sidebar
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I re-wrote my opening paragraph for this article six times. Here are a few things I changed:

1. Second sentence – Sometimes our words seem as though they're feral cats defying our every effort to round them up and do what we want. (shortened)
2. Fifth sentence – That does have a more colorful bent (original sentence). Re-wrote to remove loftiness.
3. Sixth sentence – Changed from now to but and added yield. I needed to offer a second, even briefer, choice here.

I think it's a littl. . . uh . . . an improvement, don't you?